It’s not soccer, it’s fodbold

After hearing the “it’s not soccer, it’s football” argument for the umpteen-thousandth time, I’ve decided to put together a list of similar arguments that I’d like to hear made more often.

  • It’s not soccer, it’s “Association Football.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s “nogomet.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s “podosfairo.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s “calcio.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s “sokker.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s “pop.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s a “hoagie.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s just a “theory.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s “the War of Northern Aggression.”
  • It’s not soccer, it’s my brother.
  • It’s not soccer, it’s basketball, and frankly I’m concerned that you mistook the two for each other—do even you watch sports?
  • It’s not soccer, oh no wait my mistake, yes, that’s soccer. We are in agreement. Carry on.

What do you think?

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